Review of MORTAL ENGINES – Rated PG-13

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This humble opinion is brought to by you T. K. Edwards

MORTAL ENGINES  – Rated PG-13  – 2 hr. 8 mins

Director by:  Christian Rivers

Cast:  Hugo Weaving, Hera Hilmar, Robert Sheehan, Jihae, Ronan Raftery, Leila George, Patrick Malahide, Stephen Lang

Huge mobile cities ride on wheels and consume others for survival, but there is more to this world than what’s on the surface and only one person can save everyone.

SPOILERS ARE BELOW

I am going to start this article with a list of movies that I consider to be BAD films:

  • JUPITER ASCENDING
  • ERAGON
  • CLOUD ATLAS
  • THE GOLDEN COMPASS
  • CITY OF EMBER

The reason for this list, if you haven’t guessed, is because I am now adding another movie to it and that movie is called MORTAL ENGINES.  Going in to the theater, I had an overwhelming feeling inside me that MORTAL ENGINES was going to be a bad watch for me, but I still went in and gave it my full attention.  And wouldn’t cha know it, I was right! This movie pretty much just stole cool scenes from other good movies and tried to pawn them off as their own. There was a giant MAD MAX FURY ROAD monster truck chase.  A Sigourney Weaver ALIEN 3 plummet to her death scene. A new recasted EMPIRE STRIKES BACK “I am your father” anti-climatic moment. A darker version of the Grinch realizing his heart is growing bigger and he can now feel love for the first time in his cold existence.  I could keep going, but it will just make me more irritated. So, moving on…Just like the movies I listed above, MORTAL ENGINES is a story that seems to be more personal to just the writer and the director. I’ll give them credit though, they really swung for the fences with this one.  I mean they really wanted this one to become a franchise hit. You can tell that even the actors thought this one was going to be huge, just by the way they were carrying themselves throughout the film. Every scene was just a little too emotional and just a little too over the top. They were shown the line “not to cross” and they snuck a couple of toes over it anyway.  So in conclusion, do not see this movie. Please don’t see this movie. Let this one fade away to the bottom of the list I provided above. There was a reason they released it so late in the year…TAX WRITE-OFF!!! Until next time, thanks for reading.

P.S. – There is no post credit scene, but if you find my 2 hours and 8 minutes I would like to have them back please.  Thanks.